Persuasion
Tactics in a Person-to-Person Setting
By Michael Lee
Persuasion is easier
to apply during a conversation between two people, as opposed
to communicating in front of a group. This is because in a person-to-person
setting, the opportunity to better understand the point of view
of the other party exists. You can nitpick and delve into every
single detail, as opposed to speaking to an audience, where the
interaction is usually one sided.
In this kind of setting,
it is possible for you and the other person to reach a compromise
that would bring the best probable value for both of you. You
may even want to change your stance while you're at it. In short,
person-to-person conversations are so open and flexible that it
allows not just you to change course, but also allow you to alter
another person's mindset.
How do you get the
most out of person-to-person interactions?
Have Patience
Persuasion may not
happen on your first try - or even the second, the third, or the
fourth. There are times that a certain idea has to be pondered
on and assessed more deeply and critically, that to be too aggressive
in getting acceptance might only ruin chances of a good deal.
We've been through this situation before. How many times have
we been told, "If you try to push me one more time, I will
have to turn you down"?
Effective persuasion
requires skill, not annoying pushiness. If you are sensitive enough
to know the symptoms of agreement or submission, you will be able
to steer the conversation to a point where you have the opportunity
to persuade. If the other party doesn't seem to be leaning toward
your idea and his or her body language shows it, then you should
know better to try at another time instead.
Stop Yourself From
Rebutting Too Much
One of the greatest
mistakes of persuasiveness is your penchant to answer back and
rebut. We often try to pretend to listen to another person's idea,
which we do not really agree to, when in fact, what we are doing
is preparing for a rebuttal to his or her statements. No matter
how discreet you try to be at this, the other party will eventually
notice that you are zoned out and will do the same to you when
it's your turn to give your ideas.
What ensues is a discussion
that has two levels: one that is verbal and obvious, and one that
is based on underlying meanings and subliminal banter. You may
be able to prove your point and so will the other person, but
nobody really wins.
Nobody can successfully
persuade if the conversation is just based on a subliminal battle.
When you're trying to sell something, this will be your deal killer.
In a friendship, this is what will burn bridges. This habit is
very undesirable. Try to stop yourself every time you feel inclined
to do so.
To effectively persuade
another person, you have to truly believe in what you are saying.
Intellectual honesty and genuine concern for other people will
give you that persuasive edge. If you don't feel passionate enough,
the other party will notice it and will not be convinced. It's
not likely that you will be able to successfully sell an idea
you have feel no passion about.
In addition, you can't
be effective at persuasion if you are not open to being persuaded
also. Remember, you're not the only one who is trying to get your
point heard. In a person-to-person setting, the other party is
also seeking to win you over to his or her side.
In order to persuade,
you must be sincere. Aside from that, you also need to effectively
communicate your emotions and thoughts. You can do this not just
by saying the right things, but also by employing the proper assertive
behavior and body language. Thus, if you want to improve your
persuasion skills, don't be a drag. Be open-minded and show it.
